Teaching your son about healthy boundaries requires helping him understand that it's okay to express emotions, says mental health coach Kiara Jain.
- How to talk to your teenager? Get expert parenting advice from rediffGURUS HERE.
Consent means giving permission and it must be given freely, without pressure or manipulation.
Healthy boundaries, on the other hand, involve understanding and respecting personal space, feelings and the rights of others.
Teaching your son about these principles from a young age is essential in order to help him grow into empathetic and respectful individual.
It's about ensuring they understand that everyone has the right to say NO and they should not feel obligated to do something against their will.
These values are not just about avoiding harm -- they are about promoting kindness, respect and consideration in all interactions.
In recent times, with the rising cases of sexual and physical harassment coming to light, it has become crucial for parents and teachers to understand the importance of teaching sons what the concept of consent means from a young age.
The formative years of children are what build their foundation.
Instilling values of respect and valuing the fact that a girl or a woman is saying no is extremely important when it comes to building a safe society where women feel valued and protected.
Having this conversation with your sons is very important. It needs to be an ongoing dialogue that should evolve as your son grows.
Here are five tips to teach your sons about consent and healthy boundaries:
1. Be the ideal role model with well-mannered behaviour
It is often said that learning starts at home. A child first learns at home and then from the outside world.
Children learn a lot through observation and tend to pick up many habits by imitation.
Therefore, a parent needs to be extremely careful about her/his actions. Be the ideal role model to your son by showing him how to respect the opposite gender.
Making others feel comfortable around you is very important; if they don't, pull away from the situation. Your son will pick up on these actions.
Practise understanding others' emotions and decisions and respecting them in front of your son. This will teach him that consent is important and that respecting boundaries is essential at all times.
2. Start at an early age with age-appropriate conversations
Beginning as early as possible is always a good idea. You don’t need to wait until your son is of a mature age to help him understand the idea of permission.
Small children can also grasp information if it is presented in a way they understand. For example, always teach your son to immediately stop a particular behaviour if someone says No.
As he grows older, you can start discussing consent related to physical boundaries and personal space.
3. Foster genuine connections
Create an open environment where your son feels comfortable having difficult conversations with you.
It's important to establish a non-judgmental zone where he feels accepted and can express his thoughts and emotions without fear of punishment.
This approach helps avoid frustration and creates a sense of belonging, encouraging your son to come to you if he wishes to discuss anything.
Discussing it with his friends of the same gender, who may lack the maturity to handle such topics would not give him any guidance.
When talking about consent and boundaries, always provide clear examples to minimise ambiguity.
4. Talk about social pressures
In today's world, social media platforms, films and OTT can create false impressions about consent and boundaries.
It's unfortunately common for unhealthy expectations about relationships and consent to be portrayed in TV shows, videos and games.
Such influences can affect your son's mindset negatively.
Monitor the kind of content your son consumes online as he may struggle to distinguish between appropriate and inappropriate behaviour.
Encourage him to challenge the content he watches and educate him about what is respectful and disrespectful.
It's important to teach him not to mimic inappropriate nature seen online or in video games.
Also, it is crucial to discuss social pressure and emphasise making decisions based on his moral assessment of what is right and wrong rather than following the crowd.
5. Encourage sensitivity and awareness of emotions
Men are often encouraged to hide their sensitive side and always be tough.
However, teaching your sons about healthy boundaries requires helping them understand that it's okay to express emotions.
Encourage your son to recognise how his actions impact others. Use examples such as, "How would you feel if someone did something to you without your consent?"
It's also crucial to educate your son about recognising emotions.
Boys should be able to sense if someone is uncomfortable by looking at their expression and body language.
Teaching him empathy towards others is vital for understanding consent and respecting boundaries.
Teaching your son about consent and healthy boundaries is essential.
It requires a non-judgmental outlook and patience on the part of parents.
If you begin early, when your son is at a tender age, he will grow up with these values that will help him through his life.
- How to talk to your teenager? Get expert parenting advice from rediffGURUS HERE.
