'Nobody Has The Right To Criticise My Dance Because Of My Skin Colour'

This is the story of a man who fought racism and casteism throughout his life to become a professor of Bharata Natyam at the premier centre for performing arts in India, the Kerala Kalamandalam.

This is the story of a boy who loved dancing but was ridiculed by everyone around him.

This is the story of a boy who fought poverty to chase his passion.

This is the story of a boy who was not allowed to step into other houses as he was born in a caste that is considered lower in the social strata.

This is the story of a man who fought racism and casteism throughout his life to become a professor of Bharata Natyam at the premier centre for performing arts in India, the Kerala Kalamandalam.

This is the story of Dr R L V Ramakrishnan.

"What pains me is even today, people look at me from the prism of caste and skin colour," Professor R L V Ramakrishnan tells Shobha Warrier/Rediff.com.

How it was growing up in an extremely poor Dalit household

I was born in a large household with five older sisters and two older brothers.

Both my parents were daily wage workers -- mother worked in a hotel and father was a coolie.

They used to get paid 10-12 rupees daily which they used to buy rice and kerosene from the ration shop.

We could not afford any vegetables. At home, we had only rice and chammanthi.

That's why we children also started working very early in life so that we could help our parents.

If we wanted to eat vegetables or meat, we bought them from our earnings. You cannot blame our parents. What could you buy for Rs 10?

That was how we survived the '80s and the '90s.

Folk music was part of his life

Singing along with playing the drums is part of our Dalit culture. At all important events, the singer himself plays the drums, sings and also dances to the beat.

Naturally, I grew up listening to them and seeing them dance which cultivated a kind of rhythm and melody within me.

Folk songs were not just part of our culture, everybody in our family sang folk songs beautifully.

It was my elder brother Kalabhavan Mani (a well-known actor in Malayalam cinema) who became very famous singing our folk songs. He was instrumental in bringing these songs to the public arena.

Till then, they remained within our communities and the rest of the society had no knowledge of these folk songs.

The only one who loved dancing...

While all my siblings were good singers, I was the only one who was interested in dancing.

We didn't have a radio at home. We didn't even have electricity. We survived only on kerosene lamps.

It was my favourite pastime to dance to the songs I heard from our neighbour's radio. That was how I took my first steps.

How can a boy dance...

My school had a dance teacher, but boys were not allowed to learn dance. The only option I had was peep through the window and watch what she taught the girls.

Back in class, I used to repeat what I had learnt observing them. Though the entire class enjoyed my dances, the other boys used to ridicule me for dancing. But it never deterred me from pursuing my love.

Making money to learn dancing from the age of 9

From when I was in 5th standard till 10th, during the weekends, I used to work as a coolie doing all kinds of work a schoolboy could do -- from picking coconuts to cleaning the backyards to carrying cow dung, sand, hay, etc.

For washing an auto, I was paid two rupees.

I saved all the money I earned doing such odd jobs, and finally used it to pay the guru who could teach me dance.

Not just me, all my sisters and brothers also did odd jobs so that they could pursue whatever each person wanted. You can say, we took care of ourselves.

The guru who understood his passion

My dream was to learn dance from RLV Anand master. He used to come to a Nair tharavadu to teach.

But I had no permission to enter the household as I was a Dalit. Moreover, my father was a labourer there.

How can a Dalit boy whose father worked as a coolie of an upper caste family, enter the house?

So, my only option was to stand behind the window and watch what the guru was teaching.

Seeing my love for dance, the master told me, 'if you are so passionate about dancing, come to my house. I will teach you'.

While all the other children went there with their parents, I went alone with the money I had saved.

I had bought vettila and adaka as dakshina for the guru. I was a 5th standard student then.

That was the beginning of my Bharata Natyam classes.

Since he was not from an upper caste, I could go inside his house.

As he knew my financial situation, he didn't take any fee from me.

My guru had the prefix RLV before his name as he was a product of the famous RLV Institute of Music and Fine Arts.

So, my dream also was to study there and have RLV before my name.

Yes, I did realise my dream.

Arangettam at the school youth festival

When I was in 10th standard, my school teachers urged me to have my arangettam and then perform at school. But I didn't have the money to organise an arangettam which is an expensive affair.

It so happened that my arangettam was at the school youth festival in 1992. That was where I performed for the first time on stage.

I could afford to buy only the chilanga (trinket). So, I took the dresses and ornaments on rent.

That was a day I will never forget in my life. I was so excited that I didn't want to remove my dress even after the performance.

After my arangettam, I started taking dance classes for small children. Again, a way to make some extra money.

Finally, getting to study at the RLV Institute

Though my desire was to study Bharata Natyam at RLV, I didn't get admission first.

When there was a vacancy for Mohiniyattam, I joined the class as the only boy in the class.

Once again, it was mainly ridicule that I faced as the only boy learning Mohiniyattam.

I was called Mohini..Mohini.. and also 'Mohanan among Mohinis'.

But I refused to get affected by the taunts.

I must admit, my heart was in Bharata Natyam that I used to apply for Bharata Natyam every year.

Post graduation, M Phil and Doctorate in Mohiniyattam

As luck would have it, when RLV got affiliated to MG University, it got permission to offer the first Post Graduate dance course.

I had the good fortune to do the first post graduate course in Mohiniyattam and I passed with first rank in the university. Then, I also did another post graduation in Bharata Natyam.

It was only when I secured the first rank that the others realised how passionate I was about the art form.

The very next year, when I was appointed as a temporary lecturer at my college, I was not applauded but the newspapers teased me that a Mohanan has joined as the teacher to teach Mohinis!

Though I taught Mohiniyattam, I performed only Bharata Natyam on stage. That was because in those days, if you were to perform Mohiniyattam, you had to dress as a woman which did not appeal to me at all.

I prefer to dance as a man, and Bharata Natyam offered me that option then.

Then I got the chance to do research under the MPhil with Doctorate Integrated course offered by Kerala Kalamandalam.

When I told my guide that I wanted to choose the subject 'Gender discrimination in classical dance' for my thesis. It was something I faced from the time I started dancing, and more so when I joined Mohiniyattam course. She encouraged me by saying, 'it is a fantastic idea'.

Surprise findings about Mohiniyattam as research continued...

It was during the detailed study for my Doctorate thesis that I discovered why Mohiniyattam the art form was misinterpreted by everyone.

It is generally perceived that this art form originated from the Devadasi system, and that it embodied lasyam which means it is performed by women in response to the male energy of cosmic dance of tandavam.

The fact is, it is mentioned in Ulloor S Paramesawara Iyer's Kerala Sahitya Charitram that it was Karthika Thirunal Rama Varma Maharaja (who ruled Travancore between 1758 and 1798), who asked his patrons to create a dance form that was rooted in Kerala. The result was Mohiniyattam, and it was not performed in temples but in theatre then.

It also means it is a very recent art form and it has no roots in the devadasi system.

From what I unearthed at the archives, I also found that because there were no devadasis in Kerala, two dasis were brought from the nearby areas to perform Mohiniyattam.

In the 1930s, Mahakavi Vallathol took the initiative to rejuvenate ancient art forms of Kerala and he brought in Krishna Paniker Asan to Kerala Kalamandalam.

Vallathol wanted to create a new and better form of Mohiniyattam without its obscenities.

The surprise part is, Vallathol renamed the new Mohiniyattam as Kairali Nrutham.

Unfortunately, even experts are still not aware of this. They prefer to hang on to the old beliefs and look at Mohiniyattam as lasyam, thus misinterpreting it and misinforming the public.

Through my doctorate thesis and as a professor of Mohiniyattam at the premier dance institute, I want to transform Mohiniyattam to Kairali Nrutham as desired by Vallathol.

That's why, we make male dancers perform Mohiniyattam as male and not dressed as female.

Yes, what I did shocked the conservatives so much that they resorted to attack and criticised me heavily. They must understand that I was only following what Vallathol said.

Creating history

When I was appointed as the Professor in the D=department of Bharata Natyam at Kerala Kalamandalam, what I felt was a kind of numbness.

It had been a very turbulent journey so far. Throughout my life, I was swimming against the tides, and had to face a lot of hurdles.

Maybe that's why when my name appeared in the rank list to be a professor, there was a kind of calmness within me.

What made me happy was, I became a part of the history of Kerala Kalamandalam.

After 90 years, the institution created a new department for Bharata Natyam, and I am the first professor of the department, that too, a male professor!

The most unforgettable moment

One achievement that gave me the utmost happiness was when I was awarded the doctorate in Mohinayattam.

I can say that even when I got my first job also, I didn't feel that happy.

I was so excited that couldn't sleep at all that night. I spent the entire night walking outside.

I was also very distressed because I missed my chettan (Kalabhavan Mani) who supported me in every possible way he could. But he was not there to share my happiness...

Facing racial abuse from puritans

I am not exaggerating when I say that even today, there is only limited access to many households for people like us.

A very bad experience which I can't forget even today, happened at a professor's place when I was a dance student.

Because he was a professor and an expert in Natya Sastra, I thought he would be above all these caste prejudices.

In my excitement to share something with him, I ran to his place. As I was running up the steps, he asked me to stop there.

I just froze there. It came as a rude shock to me and pained me immensely.

I would say at least 50% of society still look at us through the caste lens.

There are also households where I am always welcome, where I can even enter their kitchen and have food there.

I never had any problem saying I was a Dalit.

In fact, I would go on to say that I was able to learn these art forms because I was a Dalit.

Do you know why?

Unlike in the past when everybody had to learn under the Gurus, today you can go to a college and learn any art form.

If that opportunity was not there, how could a Dalit boy like me who was denied permission to enter an upper caste household, learn dance?

Where would Dalit students like us go if the government had not reserved seats for SC/ST students?

When I had utilised all the grants offered by the government for SC/ST students, why should I be ashamed to say that I was a Dalit?

But...

Nobody has the right to racially abuse me and create obstructions in front of me just because I belonged to the Dalit community.

Nobody has the right to criticise my dancing based on my skin colour.

It hurts.

What pains me is, even today, people look at me from the prism of caste and skin colour.

Feature Presentation: Ashish Narsale/Rediff.com