The parents of Squadron Leader Abhimanyu Rai, who died in a trainer jet crash, say they were ignored for entitlements and honours that went exclusively to their daughter-in-law and are demanding a change in government policy.
A pilot in the Indian Air Force, 33-year-old Squadron Leader Rai died in a plane crash on December 4, 2023, near the Air Force Academy in Hyderabad while training a foreign cadet.
He was flying a Pilatus PC-7 Mark-II aircraft, a trainer jet, with a foreign cadet under his training when it crashed near the Academy killing both of them.
Group Captain Amitabh Rai (retd) and his wife Chitralekha said they lost their only son Abhimanyu in December, 2023 but they have not received even a word of condolence from the government so far.
They feel the policy for such cases needs to be tweaked to accommodate the parents of the martyred bravehearts apart from their wives.
"We know of at least a dozen parents of martyrs who have been ignored when it came to according entitlements, which went exclusively to their wives," Chitralekha told PTI in an exclusive interview here on Wednesday.
"One year and three months have passed since we suffered the worst tragedy of our life, losing our only son in a trainer jet crash near the Air Force Academy in Hyderabad. But we did not receive even a word of condolence to date from either the prime minister or the defence minister," Amitabh Rai said.
"Why should a word of condolence be the exclusive privilege of only the martyr's wife," he asked.
He said in many cases, the wives of slain or martyred soldiers leave or ill-treat their in-laws after getting compensation and half the pension of their husbands. At times, they even drag them to court to claim their share in their late husband's ancestral property, he claimed.
"The wife of a slain soldier is called a 'veer nari' (brave woman) but not his mother who gave birth to him, brought him up and inculcated in him a love for the country that was strong enough to make him lay down his life for it. Is it fair?" asks Group Captain Rai.
"We know what it takes to groom your son like that and make him a soldier ready to die for his country. But, unfortunately, no one seems to take notice of the fact," says he.
The awareness that their son is not treated as a "martyr" despite having died in the line of duty only deepens their sense of hurt.
"As his death was not a 'battle casualty', they don't treat our son as a martyr. Our question is didn't he die for the nation?" asks Chitralekha.
"My son had even served for one-and-a-half years in the prime minister's fleet," Group Captain Rai, who retired from the Indian Air Force (IAF) in 2017 after 32 years of service, said.
The plane crashed during a low-level navigation sortie, says the braveheart's father.
"My son was a dedicated soldier. The foreign cadet was admittedly weak in memory and slow in learning things. He also lacked confidence and was not keen on continuing with his training.
"He had written all this in a letter to Abhimanyu. But as the passing out parade was near after which he was to be commissioned into the air force of his country, Abhimanyu decided to help him complete his training by taking him on the training sortie during which the jet crashed," his father said.
Asked why his son did not bring the foreign cadet's reluctance to complete his training to his superiors, Group Leader Rai said maybe he was under pressure.
"He might have been hesitant to take the matter to the higher-ups because diplomatic ties between the two countries are involved. The trainer pilots are under pressure to complete the training process successfully," Rai said.
Training of cadets from friendly countries is done as part of a diplomatic exercise to strengthen ties with them and the resulting pressure comes on the soldiers, he said.
It is an inherent flaw in the system which needs to be addressed, he said.
"An inquiry is underway to ascertain what exactly led to the crash and until that happens, we are assailed by all sorts of doubts about the circumstances at the time of the crash such as whether our son was overworked or under pressure or some error was committed by the weak and ill-confident foreign cadet under training," Rai said.
The Rais visited the crash site in Hyderabad and erected a memorial in the name of their martyred son at their own expense. The couple also visited the foreign cadet's country, met his parents and extended financial assistance to them as a goodwill gesture.
"We went to meet the parents of the deceased foreign cadet. Our pain was common. We had both lost our sons. My wife and the cadet's mother cried on each other's shoulders," he said.
However, the loss of a son has not deterred Group Captain Amitabh Rai (retd) from training bright young boys free of cost to join the armed forces and serve their motherland with valour.
© 2025