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'What do they gain from making the lives of three children miserable?'
'What do they gain from making a wife cry day and night?'
In November last year when Rediff.com's Shobha Warrier spoke to Raihana Kappan, a month after her husband Sidhique Kappan, a Delhi-based journalist was arrested in Mathura under Section 17 of the Unlawful Activities (Prevention) Act, she was hopeful that he would soon get bail and come back home.
He was on his way to Hathras to meet the family of the girl who was gang raped and murdered.
A year and more has passed. Sidhique Kappan is still languishing in jail.
With the support system gone, his 38-year-old wife who has never worked and three children, including a college going teenager, have to fend for themselves.
Raihana talks to Shobha about life without her husband in the concluding segment of a two-part interview.
Do you personally feel it is tough to be a Muslim in India now?
Yes, I feel that way now. It is as if it is a mistake to be a Muslim in India now.
One question the police asked Sidhikka was, why does a Muslim have so much sympathy for a Dalit?
Why did Sidhikka go to Hathras? Is it not the duty of a journalist to find out the truth behind what happened to that girl?
Today, is anybody talking about the girl? It is not an offence to gang rape a girl. It is not an offence to kill a girl. Those criminals are innocent.
But the man who went to write about the issue has become the biggest offender.
I am not an activist, or a person who thinks in those lines. I am just an ordinary woman from a remote village in Malappuram district.
But today, I am forced to say, to be a Muslim in India is very difficult.
And if you are a Muslim journalist, it seems you can't write without fear.
Experience has taught me this. As you know, experiences change a person and the way she thinks.
What has become of my life? Today, both of us have lost our normal lives.
The situation is such that even the lives of our children also have changed.
Actually, some people have forced these changes on us.
You had told me earlier that Kappan was very close to his mother. How did he take his Umma's death?
Siddhikka was very special to Umma. When he went to Delhi to work, she used to ask him, if something happens to me, will you be able to come? He had promised her that he would be home in 2 hours if she needed him.
But when she passed away, he could not be here, and he has not yet got over it.
He could not even see her body. Losing her on one side, and then being in the jail despite not doing anything bad, has affected him terribly.
Did they not give permission to come home?
We hoped that he would get bail then. But the bail plea was rejected.
He could not accept the fact that Umma is not there now. He has not come out of depression even today.
He feels very guilty that he wronged his mother as he could not keep the promise he had given to his Umma.
For the last one year, Kappan has not been working. How do you manage?
His journalist friends help us. My family is also there. KUWJ takes care of the case.
He has been very upset about the fact that I am accepting help from others.
He tells me not to take any financial help and if at all I accept any money, I should write down everything.
He said, 'When I come back, I have to give back every penny.'
That's the kind of person he is. He thinks it is humiliating that I am accepting financial help from others.
But then, I do not have a job, and I am not educated enough to work outside.
Now, I have started something in a small way. I have a few orders to make chocolates.
Let him feel relieved that I am doing something to take care of the family.
That is not a big issue for me now, I only want him back home.
The house construction was going on when he was arrested, but his journalist friends saw to it that it was completed.
The house was a dream for him. He wanted a room where he could keep all his books, where he could sit, read and write...
Do you feel this one year has changed not just your life but you as a person too?
Yes, not just my life, I have also changed.
I was living on hope initially, but as days by, I am losing hope.
Sometimes I wonder what kind of pleasure these politicians get by keeping innocent people in jail.
Does this not prick their conscience? Do they feel happy doing this?
What do they gain from keeping an innocent journalist in prison, without trial?
What do they gain from making the lives of three children miserable?
What do they gain from making a wife cry day and night?
Feature Presentation: Aslam Hunani/Rediff.com