Jaspal Bhatti's Top 10 WITTIEST quips!

Just last month, Jaspal Bhatti made it on our list of The 25 GREATEST characters on Indian TV before the news of his sudden demise in a car accident shocked the country.

A satirist and humorist par excellence, Bhatt's funny jibes on the social structure produced unforgettable creations like Flop Show. 

Here's a tribute to his sparkling wit with a compilation of 10 quotable quips from the series famously 'Misdirected by Jaspal Bhatti.'

P:S: Although the loose translation in English gives you a gist of the joke, it's true fun can be appreciated in Bhatti speak alone. 

'Badi afsos ki baat hai ki ji chalees filon ko kutarne mein choohon ne ek din lagaya tum dus din mein un filon ke list taiyyar nahi kar sakte?'

'Jab humari shaadi hui thi toh dowry agreement mein yeh clause rakhi gayi thi ke agar biwi ke wajah se mujhe heart trouble hui toh yeh ilaaj ka kharcha sasuralwalon ko karna hoga.'

Translation: The dowry agreement at the time of our marriage carried a clause that if I develop heart trouble because of my wife, my in-laws will foot in the bill for my treatment.

'Agar kutte ko kuch ho gaya toh mein ghar ka rahoonga na ghaat ka.'

'Tum ek purani aur tooti phutti ghadi ke ghum ho jaane par apne brand new pati ko chhod ke jaa rahi ho. Agar kal yeh khabar shaher mein phail gayi toh jaanti ho kya hoga? Kai pati jaan bujh kar apni ghadiyan ghuma denge.'

'Madame mera matlab toh sirf itna tha ki telephone call hi itni mehengi hoti hain ki agar wrong number bhi hai thodi baat toh ki jaaye na.'

Translation: Pardon me madam but what I meant was that phone calls these days are so damn expensive that even if it is a wrong number, one should try and make the most of it by chatting a little.

'Chief Guest banne mein sabse badi dikkat pata hai kya hai? Ek toh sabse aage wali line mein baithke gardan akkad jaati hai. Doosra, agar item buri lage toh Chief Guest bechara hooting bhi nahi kar sakta hai.'

Translation: The worst thing about being a chief guest is. One, you are made to sit bang in front producing a cramp in the neck. Secondly, the poor chap is forbidden to hoot at an item if he doesn't like it.

'Agar talashi ho jaati to humare ghar mein ek bhi paisa nahi hai. Yeh aur bhi badnaami ki baat hai.'

Translation: If the cops ran a raid inside our house, they'd realise we don't have any money. Good lord, the shame!

'Kya baat kar rahe hain, Mistriji? Agar mein isse tudwakar lohe ke bhaav bhi bechun chaar hazaar toh phir  bhi mil jayega. Aakhir gaadi hai, chhat hai, chaar paiyen hain. Hazaar rupaye toh per paiyen milna hi chahiye na?'

'Jo humare dukaan ki mithaiyan khaata hai woh inke dukaan ki davaaiyan zaroor khata hai.'