« Back to article | Print this article |
Forget your ex, confess your love and don't hesitate to make the first move.
Dating after divorce sucks, and if you've been married and out of the dating game for the last seven to 10 years, it's an entirely different world these days.
According to Huffington Post, it's not just about texting, sexting, or tweeting play-by-plays throughout the night, you have changed too.
You may communicate differently, have evolved your values, and are consumed by things a single man or woman just can't relate to.
All that makes for a very awkward first date if you are not careful.
As one girlfriend put it, "I always seem to say something that freaks them out."
Another added, "Dating is so bad it makes me miss my ah ex."
However, there is no need to panic as there are a few tips on dating which could prove successful divorce.
Rule 1: Ask the guy out
Some women still refuse to ask the guy out, but it's the post-millennium, folks.
If you are interested in a guy, go for it.
Please click NEXT to continue reading...
Don't just assume he's paying -- even though he damn well should.
It's a whole new ball game these days.
Your best bet is to plan to go Dutch from the get-go.
This will avoid that tense moment when the bill arrives and you both eye it unsure of what to do next.
Illustration: Dominic Xavier
Don't bring up your "no sex on the first date" rule at the start of the evening.
You may want to make it clear that you are not easy, but find some way to approach it later in a flirty, non-abrupt way.
Illustration: Uttam Ghosh
Don't even think about bringing up your ex.
Yes, he was a huge part of your life and there is a lot you still want to get off your chest about him.
Just pretend he doesn't exist for the night.
Even if your date asks, just change the subject.
You don't want to be remembered as the date that whined about their ex all night.
Illustration: Uttam Ghosh
Along the same lines, don't complain about your kids.
It used to be that complaining about your roommates was cute and funny.
The same doesn't go for bitching about your kids. It's a big downer.
Of course you want him to get to know you, but don't scare him off.
Illustration: Uttam Ghosh
If a guy admits he isn't handy or can't cook, don't tell him what a culinary genius your ex, father, or son is.
Sure guys like a little macho competition, but this is just annoying.
Illustration: Uttam Ghosh
Don't limit dates to the weekend.
These days, people are more open to meeting up whenever.
Illustration: Uttam Ghosh
Ditch the "I want more babies" talk.
If you love being a mom, it's easy to lapse into endless conversation about them and gush about wanting more.
But a first or second date is just too soon.
Illustration: Dominic Xavier
Experiment with flirty texts and pictures.
The last time you were on the market, this didn't exist and it may seem silly at first.
Try it out. It's a sexy way to keep up interest and intrigue.
Illustration: Uttam Ghosh
A lot of dating advice books say this is a no-no on the first date, but what are you waiting for?
If his stance on the right to choose is a deal breaker, why not get it out of the way?
You don't want to waste his time or yours.
Illustration: Dominic Xavier