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'Worried about husband's relationship with co-worker'

March 14, 2023 12:29 IST

'If you have concerns about the nature of the relationship, express them and let your husband know how it makes you feel,' advises Dr Ashish Sehgal.

Do you feel that you are constantly stressed?

Are you worried about your relationship with your partner or friends or colleagues?

Or maybe you just want to work on yourself and become a better person.

rediffGuru Dr Ashish Sehgal, who has over 20 years of experience as a counsellor, can help you with your concerns.

Ask Dr Ashish Sehgal your questions HERE.

Relationship woes

Illustration: Dominic Xavier/Rediff.com

Anonymous: Dr Ashish ji, Is it normal that my husband texts a coworker that he misses her? Am I overreacting ?

It is not uncommon for people to develop close friendships with their co-workers, but it's important to consider the context and the nature of your husband's text to his coworker.

If your husband has a close working relationship with this co-worker and the text was innocent in nature, there may not be any cause for concern. However, if your husband and this co-worker have a history of flirting or if the text seems overly affectionate, it could be a sign of an inappropriate relationship.

In any case, it's important to have an open and honest conversation with your husband about your concerns.

Ask him to explain the context of the text and his relationship with this co-worker. If you have concerns about the nature of the relationship, express them and let your husband know how it makes you feel.

It's also important to consider whether this text is consistent with your husband's behaviour towards other co-workers. If your husband has a pattern of texting or communicating with co-workers in an overly affectionate manner, it could be a red flag and may indicate a deeper issue.

Ultimately, it's important to trust your instincts and to have an open and honest conversation with your husband about your concerns. If you continue to feel uneasy about the situation, it may be helpful to seek the guidance of a therapist or a relationship coach.

 

Anonymous: My son has take up smoking as habit ,and I don't like it. How to advise him?

If your son has recently started smoking, it's important to address the issue and encourage him to quit as soon as possible. Here are some tips on how to talk to your son about quitting smoking: 

Be open and honest: Start by expressing your concern for his health and well-being. Explain the dangers of smoking and the impact it can have on his future.

Listen to his reasons for smoking: Ask your son why he started smoking and try to understand his perspective. This can help you address his specific concerns and reasons for smoking.

Provide education and resources: Explain the health benefits of quitting smoking and provide him with information on smoking cessation programmes and support groups.

Offer support: Let your son know that you're there for him and that you'll support him through the quitting process. Offer to help him find resources or a support group.

Lead by example: If you smoke, try quitting yourself. If you don't smoke, continue to lead a healthy lifestyle and encourage your son to do the same.

Be patient and understanding: Quitting smoking can be a difficult process, and it may take several attempts. Encourage your son to keep trying and not to give up.

Avoid criticising or blaming: It's important to approach the conversation with your son in a non-judgmental and supportive manner. Criticising or blaming him will likely only make the situation worse.

Remember, quitting smoking is a personal decision that your son needs to make for himself. Your role is to offer support and encouragement, and to provide resources to help him along the way. You can also consult a specialist for help.

 

Anonymous: Dr Ashishji, How can society better support senior citizens who are struggling with mental health issues?

There are several ways that society can better support senior citizens who are struggling with mental health issues:

Increase access to mental health services: This includes providing resources and funding for mental health clinics, counselling services and other forms of mental health treatment.

Raise awareness of mental health issues among seniors: Many seniors may not recognise the signs of mental health issues or may be reluctant to seek help. Education and awareness campaigns can help seniors understand the importance of mental health and the resources available to them.

Promote social connectedness: Social isolation can contribute to mental health issues in seniors. Programmes that encourage social interaction, such as community centres, senior centres and volunteer opportunities can help seniors feel more connected to their communities.

Provide caregiver support: Many seniors rely on family members or other caregivers for support. Caregiver support programmes can provide education, resources, and emotional support for caregivers, which can in turn benefit the senior who is receiving care.

Address financial and housing insecurity: Financial and housing insecurity can contribute to mental health issues in seniors. Programmes that provide financial assistance or affordable housing can help seniors feel more secure and reduce stress. 

Encourage intergenerational programs: Intergenerational programs can help seniors feel more connected to their communities and it can also educate younger generations on how to support senior citizens.

Encourage a culture of openness and acceptance towards mental health issues: Stigma surrounding mental health issues can prevent seniors from seeking help. Creating a culture of openness and acceptance towards mental health issues can encourage seniors to seek help when they need it.

It is important to note that mental health support for seniors should be tailored to their specific needs, cultures and preferences. Also, it's important that the programmes and services are culturally sensitive and responsive to the unique needs of older adults.

You can ask Dr Ashish Sehgal your questions HERE.

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Dr ASHISH SEHGAL