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Is your love life under pressure? Are you troubled by your relationship? Get Ahead's Love Guru hosted a chat with readers on January 8 to help them deal with love problems.
For those of you who missed it, here's the transcript.
Illustration: Dominic Xavier/Rediff.com
NAVEEN GUPTA: As I married 11 year back, just few days back I came to know that before marriage my wife was in love with some other guy. No physical relation only chat on telephone but I am little bit upset. My wife loves me lot and I too So help me way out
Love Guru: Naveen Gupta, you are upset because your wife was friendly with a man 11 years ago, before she married you? Are you also upset that she did not tell you about the time she bunked class in college to catch a film? Grow up man, so she knew a guy before marriage. What's the big deal? Don't behave like a dork over the past and mess up your present and future, behave in a mature manner
Satyakam raut: I am 34 years old. my fiance is 33 years old. We were about to get married this January 16, however it was delayed. I had cheated on her with another woman, I promised that things would be fine she forgave me. However things are not the same, somehow I feel both she and me need space. Whats the solution?
Love Guru: Satyakam Raut, you don't know how lucky you are that you are fiancee forgave you for your indiscretion. You won't find many women like her, and you will be a fool to let mental issues come in between the two of you. So get over your 'need space' stuff and make up to her, before she changes her mind about you
vidya lakshmi: hi LG, me and my hubby are married 5 years ago and are blessed with a kid 4 years old. i had complication in my pregnancy (due to gestational diabetes). now my hubby forces me for 2nd which i don't want. due to this, he is very much upset and we fight on this topic often. our relationship is affected. please help
Love Guru: Vidya Lakshmi, your husband I presume is aware of your complications during pregnancy, and still he insists on a second child? That's unusual. He sounds like someone who needs counselling. Why don't the two you see one, who can explain to him the issues in a manner that he can understand?
sanjay yadav: I have crush on my principal but she is not aware. What to do
Love Guru: Sanjay Yadav, you don't know how lucky you are that she is not aware of your shenanigans. Pray to god that it remains that way, otherwise you could land in deep trouble, my friend
kunal: i was in love with girl, infact she was in deep love with me for marriage purpose, she use to call me 40 40 times, we both are well mature and in gud jobs as well. till six months we had great time but i was not agree for marriage after her saying many a times, but after 10 months i got ready for marriage but she refused, and since last six months i tried
Love Guru: Kunal, so you were in love. So she has changed her mind. There really is nothing much you can do if she is not keen on taking the relationship to the next level, these things happen. So get over it and get a move on.
UTTIYA SARKAR: I WANT TO MARRY A GIRL WHO IS UNABLE TO DISCLOSE IT AT HOME DUE TO HER PREVIOUS BREAK UP WITH ANOTHER MAN
Love Guru: Uttiya Sarkar, work harder on convincing her. But I hope you are sure about her feelings for you?
Kummy: I am a married man with 2 daughters and both are working - my wife is a house wife and educated decent lady. she always caring on daughters. and I had decent chat with my wife on this issue and she ignoring. we both are very sinceare in all aspects. Now in my office a young lady where she is showing more interest on me just like a lover... but I am ignoring... pl help
Love Guru: Kummy, fantastic! Ignoring this unwanted diversion in your life is the best thing you can do, continue doing it.
Abhijit-Gevraikar: hi i have real love but having very problems in the right now pls help
Love Guru: Abhijit-Gevraikar, I am not an astrologer to foresee what problems you have, unless you specify, there's nothing I can say
kvagish: i am a service boy & in my office a girl is woking is pretty. I have so many times to say her about my love but she says, it is only my side, after that she talk with me on all subjects. but not agree for marrige or any type of relation. How Can I understand her. Pls help me
Love Guru: Kvagish, what is there to not understand in what she tells you? She's told you clearly that there's no love from her side, so why are you going on and on about it with her!
dhanpal: if an HR manager can chose hundreds of employees, why the same HR manager cannot chose his/her right partner? any idea?
Love Guru: Dhanpal, the choice of hundreds of employees is done by the head. The choice of a life partner is done by the heart. Hence the difficulty
dhanpal: Hig LG, if it is was love marriage, why the same couple later on fight for divorce? what kind of love was it which could not bind together after burying all hatchet? why cant love keep them tied?
Love Guru: Dhanpal, have you been watching too many Hindi films? Love, like life, is organic,and unless nurtured by both parties, will wither and die. Love is not about this great philosophy but about the little, day-to-day things which often get missed out. Anyway, if someone can fall in love, they can also fall out of love
Shinny Patnaik: Hello Love Guru, I Love my girlfriend verymuch but due to some family troubles she is scared and not able tell again about me to her parents and compromising with life. Please tell me how to get her back. Plz help
Love Guru: Shinny Patnaik, perhaps you should do the same to him before your friends, to show him how it feels? If he doesn't like it and walks off, well, it would seem like good riddance, if you think about it. What are you doing with a lout, by the way?