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'My wife wants to control me; how do I handle her?'

August 14, 2015 11:25 IST

In an online chat with Get Ahead readers on August 13, Love Guru advised them on their relationship problems

Here's the unedited chat transcript:

Kabir Khan: Last girl loved me has the same scenario as the last one.. She is mentally disturbed and unable to decide which way to go. What should I do? Shall I approach her family and try convince them? Pls advise.

Love Guru: Kabir Khan, that's a strange experience, love usually is expected to overcome barriers -- be they social, religious, linguistic, financial. I guess you have just been unlucky in this department. But stay the course, is my advice, I am sure you will soon find a soulmate who doesn't care for the differences.

Pritham T: do you really think girls can be soulmates but instead they are killing the balance of foundation with recently the self styled godwoman radhe maa posed with mini skirt and make up..

Love Guru: Pritham T, what is the point you are trying to make connecting girls and soulmates and a godwoman, I am unable to see, maybe you can clarify your point further?

Ashish Gupta: after marriage husband becomes like a jammed sandwitch, between mom and wife...whats the best way to handle them, when no option is available?

Love Guru: Ashish Gupta, no idea what you are saying? You sound like an unmarried man who has heard too many married man jokes. You will know the answer when you get married.

haran sp: hi, i have been married for 3 years, my wife wants to control me very badly, how do i handle her?

Love Guru: Haran SP, is it a new thing or has it been happening for all of the 3 years you've been married? If yes, why have you kept quiet about it for so long, and why is it bothering you now? Have you ever told her how you feel about it?

Sorry Me: Hi!! My Husband has filed a divorce case, and I was not aware .. We have been married for 11 yrs and have no issues .. after this episode, I met a top celebrity and I do not how and when I walked with him to bed... strangely I have no regrets.. whatz wrong..

Love Guru: Sorry Me, and, your problem is? That your husband filed for divorce without informing you? Or that you walked into bed with a celebrity and have no regrets about it?

Nitin Joshi: i was in a relation 2 years back but my gf broke up with me, and now i am in a relation with someone, and now my ex wants me back. i tried ignoring her but still she keeps on calling me....what should i do?

Love Guru: Nitin Joshi, change your number, block her number, report her number as spam... I mean, there are so many things one can do that one knows all about them, but somewhere I suspect you like it when she calls you, don't you? It makes you feel good, wanted, attractive to girls, right? Else, why do you need to tell me you can block her number?

subramani: We want to have been chatting with a nice girl, she is 5.5 years younger than me. We have seen the pics of each other, and like each other. Now, I have little fear in mind that, will we both like each other after meeting. Because, we have just seen pics of each other , will our feeling be same even after seeing each other?

Love Guru: Subramani, that's a chance you will have to take. Ultimately, relationships have to get real, and the only way that can happen is by moving from the virtual to the real world.

Manish Jain: Hi LG. I am working in an MNC and I like a girl who is working in the same company but in a different account. We know each other for almost a year and are decent friends. I have never confessed my feelings too her. Also recently I came to know that she has a boyfriend but not 100% sure on that. Please help what to do.

Love Guru: Manish Jain, before I help you, you need to be sure what it is you have in mind. You two are decent friends, you say, but you are not sure if she already has a boyfriend? You can ask her casually, as part of the conversation, and be sure. If she does have one and you still confess your feelings for her, it may end up awkward for you, so get that one out of the way first.

N R Sharma: She says, I want to marry you and be with you, how do I convey this to my husband (as he never raises any issue), he is a good friend, but I love you. I am taking steps, though everyone in my family would disown me, but not sure, when it would happen. Though does shows very strong emotions. At times make ne unsure about her and her motive of togetherness.

Love Guru: N R Sharma, this is where that elusive little thing called trust comes in. Do you trust her or not? Ask yourself for an honest answer. Let your future course be guided by what your honest answer is. If there are niggling doubts in you about her, why don't you share them with her and seek her answer?

Illustration: Uttam Ghosh/Rediff.com