Rediff.com« Back to articlePrint this article

V-Day Special: How to talk money to your partner

February 14, 2017 08:00 IST

Apart from love, financial compatibility too is paramount for the success of a long-lasting relationship. Here's what couples must do to work on it.

Without further ado, read on to know more!

Financial compatibility in love: What? Why?

What do we mean by financial compatibility?

By financial compatibility, we are talking about that nice happy ground where both the partners understand each other's philosophy of spending, saving, and investing money and live in harmony.

People in love, usually, have many conversations but they are rarely about money and spending unless they are staring at a dire necessity due to spiralling credit card bills. This may lead to many a discord and disagreements in the love haven!

Why is financial compatibility important?

Financial compatibility is one of the bedrocks of a successful relationship. When both the partners understand each other's spending and saving preferences and arrive at a common ground, it provides the safety net which having adequate money provides.

Many a time, one partner may be an extravagant spender while the other may not approve of the same.

Instead of mindless arguments, when the partners turn financially compatible heartaches due to money matters can be avoided!

How can people in love become financially compatible?

Now this a great question, and like every good relationship needs a lot of hard work.

Here are some ways in which financial compatibility can be achieved:

Communicate

As ever, communication is the key to a good relationship. Both the partners must make discussing money, a habit. Not just how much one earns, how one spends money, and how they save, but also about how both view money.

They should also give (receive!) open and non-judgemental feedback on the other's spending, saving, and investing habits.

This way finances do not remain a rare topic of conversation and are a part of the couple's relationship.

Maintain common accounts together

Couples should maintain a common accounts folder and do it together. This way not only are expenses tracked, but it also becomes a pleasurable exercise when couples do it together!

Who said finances are drudgery? The other advantage of maintaining common accounts together is that the couple will know where they are spending money and if their partner is alright with spending money on certain things or not.

Understand each other's financial philosophies

Now this is a significant step. Different people have different takes on how to use their money.

Some do not plan on how they spend, some are extremely cautious spenders and may be unfairly called misers; some people like to budget for expenses at the start of every month, and some people are clueless about where their money goes as they go broke a week before the month ends!

So, couples must figure out the financial philosophies of their partners. The partners should also delve deeper to understand why each of them has that particular opinion on money and if they must alter it a little for the benefit of their love!

Arrive at a middle ground

Two people in love, who are working on their financial compatibility, must arrive at a common ground with respect to money.

Obviously, this can be done only after there is complete understanding and acceptance of each other's financial philosophies. In case the two have a diametrically opposite take on money, then it requires a lot of patience and perseverance to do so!

Sticking to the middle ground

This is an indispensable part. It is far easier to arrive at a middle ground than sticking to it all through.

Any time a partner falters, the other has to gently, yet firmly pull their loved one back on track.

This may be especially true for those couples who have two totally different perspectives on money.

For example, if one partner does not like to indulge much while the other is a compulsive shopper, then both have to check their instinctive responses to stick to the middle ground which may be indulging on occasions but not in excess!

At the end of the day, financial compatibility is a trait which comes naturally to a few couples and with difficulty to the others.

It is a vital cog in the wheel and has the ability to transform a good relationship into a great one!

Financial compatibility can be acquired and doing so will lead to a blissful love life!

Happy Valentine's day!

Anil Rego