 | « Back to article | Print this article |
Invest in the person you are dating or romancing and enjoy the time you two spend together, advises Sybil Shiddell.
It could happen in a bar, at the beach, or while waiting for your bus. What matters is being open!
But if you are in a new relationship and don't know where to start, you may need some help.
These tips will help to put you in great situations and opportunities, but the secret is to be yourself.
If it's meant to be, then it'll happen because you are being genuine.
1. Get over your fear
First, try to understand where this shyness comes from.
Are you anxious to make the first move? What are the triggers for this anxiety?
If you have a knot in your stomach before daring to approach someone, that's totally normal!
People who are 100% sure of their seductive prowess simply don't exist. Nevertheless, if this knot stops you from even trying, it sounds like you might need to deal with it.
The reasons for this anxiety can be multiple: Fear of not being good enough, tendency to anticipate everything failing, worrying about stumbling over your words, or 'punching up'.
The best way to handle this is to get over it and press on. Remember, everyone feels that fear at first. But once you get past the first step, you'll feel confident and positive.
2. Look good!
Presentation really matters; make sure that you don't make a bad one. If it's the first time, it'll be all that they can remember.
Presenting yourself well reflects your personality and self respect.
It goes without saying that good hygiene is a must, no-one wants to chat to someone with green in their teeth, or a smell that follows them around the room!
To make the best first impression, it is recommended that you stand or sit a comfortable 2-4 feet apart.
Any closer and your movements can be seen as intruding on someone’s personal space.
You wouldn't like it if it happened to you, right?
3. Take your time
Coming across too keen can be disastrous, and equally biding your time and waiting days between text makes you seem dull and boring (not busy and mysterious).
Messaging back and forth can mean that you cover everything you have to say in ten minutes or less. At that point you've shown all your cards.
In the beginning the waiting phase is essential, as it allows you to really talk. If you chat about a hobby, talk about it in detail and ask them questions too -- there's no rush to romance.
4. Keep your eyes peeled!
Whether in the waiting room of a dentist, at the supermarket, or on the metro... What counts is the mental effort that you put into it and the positive energy that you release -- which is true of both seduction or for any human relationship!
Invest in the person you are dating or romancing and enjoy the time you two spend together.
Pay attention to the little signs, non-verbal cues and the details of the conversation to help you understand what your partner may truly desire from you.
Sybil Shiddell is communications manager at Gleeden, an extra marital dating Web site.
