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Delusionship is a state of mind; it is that mental rollercoaster where someone crafts a whole love story in their mind, from a dazzling proposal to happily-ever-after with kids, all without even uttering a 'hello' to their crush in reality, explains rediffGURU Ravi Mittal, CEO, Quack Quack, an online dating app.
The term 'delusionship' has recently gained traction, leaving many wondering if that's what they are suffering from.
Delusionship is a state of mind; it is that mental rollercoaster where someone crafts a whole love story in their mind, from a dazzling proposal to happily-ever-after with kids, all without even uttering a 'hello' to their crush in reality.
It's a romance staged entirely in your imagination! And introverts aren't alone in this daydream fest; even extroverts are rocking the delusionship trend.
But there's a catch. Like all good things, this too has to end. This intense 'obsession and daydreaming' has an expiration date.
Daters from every age group have called this the only upside of this trend; it is fleeting. If it lingers, it might be time to swap the rom-com script for a reality check.
Here are some tips to help you deflect this trend.
Reflect and LOL
One of the best ways to deal with a bout of delusionship is to reflect and laugh it off once it's done and dusted.
When you stare into the metaphorical mirror, have a heart-to-heart with yourself.
Reflect on your feelings and accept that it is in your head. Acknowledge the disparity between the imagined relationship and reality.
Self-awareness is the crucial first step towards understanding and addressing this issue.
Set realistic goals
Planning a wedding before exchanging a 'Hi' is equivalent to planning a world tour with zero bank balance. Instead, let's break down the fairy tale into bite-sized pieces.
When you find yourself in a delusionship, focus on making it a reality by taking small but effective steps.
Daydreaming is very last season; what you need to do now is DIY your romance. The new generation of daters doesn't wait; they act. Instead of visualising a grand romance and trying to manifest it with 'wishes,' it is better to take proactive steps to achieve the same romance.
You have already established that you have a crush; now, you might want to start with a casual chat.
Set realistic goals like asking your crush about his/her weekend plans or pampering him/her with a surprise dinner date.
Spoiler alert: No matter what rom-coms will have us believe, happily-ever-after isn't achieved in one grand gesture.
Increase your social interactions
Though extroverts are also falling prey to delusionship, introverts are more prone to it because of their lack of social skills.
For introverts crafting love stories in their minds, it's time to stop being an awkward caterpillar and take small steps to being somewhat of a social butterfly.
Interacting with more people is the best way to snap back to reality and who knows, maybe you will meet someone you actually gel with in real life and not just in your imagination.
Have a session with your BFFs
Gather your friends and spill the beans.
Give them a peek at the cinematic masterpiece you have been spinning in your head.
No one slaps some sense into you better than friends. They can be your critics, advisers and much-needed comic relief.
From helping you navigate these feelings to understanding and sorting them, friends and their support are a fantastic way to deal with this fleeting infatuation.
If nothing, it is always good to be able to share your emotions, especially complex ones, with people you trust.
Spice up your reality
Detox from your delusionship by spicing up your reality.
Try new activities and hobbies or pick up a quirky skill.
Here's where self-care comes into play. Do things to grow your mind and soul. Read a book, even if it's a romantic one. Watch a movie, go for a run or hang out with your friends.
A break from the imaginary romcom can bring fresh perspective and maybe even a real-life romance.
